LOLXENA

Welcome to the LOLXena Archives

2010-09-13T22:31:00.010-05:00

Try our random LOL-button! --->
Hours of fun, right over there! --->
I SAID CLICK ON THE BUTTON! --->

If you want to giggle like an idiot for a couple of hours, and then get the munchies, reading this site is the cheapest way to do it!

The creators of LOLXena are not dead, but they are currently taking a 25-year nap in a block of solid ice after faking their deaths before the judgmental eyes of the gods, the world, and the Fates themselves. They shall awaken in a quarter-century or so and emerge from their frosty dirt-naps when it is time to defeat the Bitch of Rome, or when LOL-pictures become a nostalgic retro-fad, whichever comes first. Only then will they stalk the earth once more, searching for redemption for their crimes against comedy.

Please stay on the sidewalks and off the grass (lol, grass). Also, avoid the news posts below, as they are full of lies and trans fats.

Now enjoy the LOLXena/LOLHerc experience!

TELL YOUR FRIENDS

Silent Movie, Part 1

2010-04-22T00:54:00.006-05:00

I declare that the first major theme of the revamped LOLXena shall be rewriting history.

You, dear readers, may continue to contribute any traditional LOLs or other funny stuff you want. Meanwhile, Ripples and I will set about rediscovering old (crappy) episodes and rewriting them in ways that make them AWESOME. This could be as simple as a series of sequential LOLs, or as complicated as a fancy new webseries...

And now, part 1 of the reimagined Athens City Academy for the Performing Bards!

Don't say I ever gave ya nothin'

2010-04-19T02:05:00.001-05:00

Hello, folks. Looks like the site is dying, isn't it? C'est la vie.

Well, we had a great run. I'd like to thank the following contributors who--

JUST KIDDING! I'm back!

For real this time! No one makes a liar out of me!

YOU CAN'T BELIEVE HOW EXCITED YOU ARE!!!

HOLY SH*T!!!

And the best part is... our other main poster, Ripples beat me to it!

(Damn, RaC, I knew you were awesome. But this makes you two WEEKS awesomer than I. We are totally on the same wavelength here. I owe you cookies.)

Ripples was wise to ease you all back into the twisted world of LOLXena with some classic LOLs. However, I see a new future for this site... a brilliant future, glowing and crackling like the lightning between Ares' fingers.

We shall EXPAND LOLXena! We shall not limit ourselves anymore to these suffocating rectangular screencaps, encrusted with stale, misspelled (misspelt? lol) text! We shall journey FORWARD into the world of memes! A new day, a new age of relevance!

In other words, people will start reading again! Perhaps a dozen loyal fans! I can't wait.

The internet is full of crazy sh*t, sh*t that THIRSTS for a touch of low-budget '90s television!

...Will we dabble in weekly GIF stories for a while? Perhaps!
...Will we encourage comedic FAN VIDEOS on wholly inappropriate themes? Time will tell!
...Will we go on deranged bursts of hilarious activity, a la THE BEST THRED EVARRR? Could very well be!
...Will we latch on to whatever 4Chan is doing now and Xenify it? Wait and see!
...Will we keep the archives open and continue to reference old memes for nostalgia's sake? Definitely!
...Will we ever give you up, let you down, run around, or desert you? NEVER!
...Will we (mostly Spaz) continue to speak with ironic, undue grandiosity regarding this site and its affiliates? Undoubtedly!

I have returned to Rome, and I formally, yet humbly, yet arrogantly invite RipplesandChurns to reign at my side as Empress. (With full admin privileges, a private wing full of attractive slaves, and the best box seats on Crucifixion Hill.) How about it, my dear? I offer my hand. 'Twould be a summer to speak of!

However, I do have some bad news. An old friend has passed on.

In commemoration of the BEST THRED EVARRR's anniversary, said thread was subjected to 50 consecutive 50-Hitler posts (for a total of 2500 Hitler pictures!), resulting in the thread being deleted FOR EVAR in the early morning hours of April 19, 2010.

BEST THRED EVARRR 4-19-10 NEVAR FORGET!

A moment of silence for TEH BEST THRED EVARRR, my old friend. It was in that very thread I first encountered the lovely Ripples and seduced her into the scandalous world of niche comedy blogs. I raise a glass to my partner in crime on our first anniversary, just as I pour out a 40 for my dead homie out in the Yuku trenches.

Peace out, my brother. Trolling my own thread was, sadly, one of the best weeks of my recent life.

And now, ONWARD! Into the UNKNOWN!

Anarky II: A Study in Multiple-Panel LOL Innovations

2010-04-19T01:54:00.006-05:00

Anarkist does the work so we don't have to. Thank you! High fives all around.

It's not something you ARE, it's something you HAVE

2010-04-07T18:30:00.009-05:00

EASTER LOLXENA, WOOO!!

2010-04-04T08:42:00.007-05:00

HULLO.

RIGHT. I will admit that I am WUBBISH. I haven't updated in months, and for that I can only apologise. You have permission to burn me and kill me and stuff.

I do however come bearing some Easter lols, wooooooo!!!

So, just a few festive lols for now, and more traditional (or not so traditional ones, perhaps) will be put up here soon. Honest. I swear.

Spaz isn't back yet, but...

2010-01-08T20:01:00.004-06:00

A fabulous gift for you!

http://www.peopleofwalmart.com/?p=8416

ROFLwaffles.

P.S. I swear this site isn't dead yet. I'm just on a break until springish. Meanwhile, I hope Ripples (see previous post) isn't dead in a ditch somewhere... Oh dear.

It's been a nearly a month in the wilderness...

2009-12-15T11:56:00.003-06:00

Just a quick note, my little nincompoops, to let you know I haven't forgotten about you all.

Alas, I do actually live a fruitful and productive life (a.k.a I am a student with deadlines) so haven't been updating the winner of the internet that is LOLXENA. Not to worry, after Friday I am as free as a biiiiiird, so there will be more posts soon!

Ok, so, sock on the door handle - do not disturb!

Because There Is Always Room For Comedy Boobs

2009-11-20T17:19:00.016-06:00

Well, Joxer thinks I'm funny...

STILL on the Harry Potter Jokes...

2009-11-13T18:09:00.014-06:00

STDs - stay safe, kids.

I can smell the colours, too...

2009-11-07T10:33:00.004-06:00

A rather wonderful contribution from Soltares for you viewing pleasure, dear public! Keep 'em coming!

I have level 500 engineering, so suck on THAT!

JOXERRAMA

2009-11-06T08:52:00.013-06:00

'A cult of personality based on the deep metaphors hidden in Joxer's seemingly-stupid statements'. I took these words to heart.

Plus, a chance to use the 'fap' tag.

And check out my first ever poll at the bottom of this page!

ALL HAIL

Better Late Than Never

2009-10-28T09:43:00.016-05:00

Ok, loyal fan(s?), it has been almost a month since the last post, for which I can only apologise. Spazzy pants is on the other side of the planet so is somewhat incapacitated, so it is really down to me for the lack of updates of late. But, enough chat, here are so-

Holy crap, ok, whatever you say....

All together now...

2009-10-02T08:57:00.003-05:00

Xena's tears cure cancer...

2009-09-29T19:50:00.005-05:00

Behold! It's time for Anarkist's retro-tribute to Chuck Norris jokes.

Also:

Just like Mama used to make

2009-09-29T19:40:00.002-05:00

We can always count on Heather for some quality, home-cooked LOLs.

Because toilet humour IS funny

2009-09-23T17:17:00.008-05:00

I'm still not over the Half-Blood Prince...

...If you know what I mean.

2009-09-21T21:59:00.004-05:00

Anarkist returns to delight us with these three fine Tales of Ribaldry:

Xena Cinema Classics III, IV, and V: Xedra style!

2009-09-16T20:12:00.002-05:00

OMFG you guys!

Xedra concocted another Youtube gem for us using Ripples' version of Kill Bill and my versions of Miss Congeniality and The Lion King. See these nonexistant cinematic masterpieces in their natural movie-trailer habitat!

Gold star

2009-09-14T00:46:00.004-05:00

Heather gets a shiny gold star because she is a repeat ~~offender~~ contributor!

Why aren't YOU contri buting?

Spiky hair is SO two years ago

2009-09-13T17:24:00.006-05:00

Dance, my HTML puppet!!! DANCE!!!

2009-09-13T17:18:00.000-05:00

ill-fated

2009-09-13T17:13:00.001-05:00

Joxer learns naughty limericks

2009-09-13T17:10:00.002-05:00

( Link would be NSFW, so no link for you. )

Putting the "fun" in "funeral"

2009-09-13T17:09:00.000-05:00

Get that dirt off your shoulders

2009-09-13T17:07:00.001-05:00

(Now that I think about it, this one might be a little sad for Buffy fans, so sorry.)

Why we fight

2009-09-13T17:06:00.001-05:00

Dangerous Weapons and You

2009-09-13T17:03:00.001-05:00

Here boy!

2009-09-13T17:02:00.000-05:00

I can haz skin?

2009-09-13T16:55:00.002-05:00

Riffin' 2: Electric Boogaloo

2009-09-13T16:49:00.001-05:00

In summary...

2009-09-13T16:44:00.003-05:00

I apologize for the crappy fonts today. My hostel (in *ahem* AUCKLAND) has lame intarwebz, so I did these offline using WordArt.

Xena Season 4 Yearbook: 1984

2009-09-09T19:01:00.004-05:00

Spencer neglected her responsibilities and personal health to continue her yearbook series!

Lots of memorials this year...

No cats, you say?

2009-09-09T09:26:00.002-05:00

Xena will show you how to be a cat.

The Quill is Mightier (than Joxer): TEH COMPLETE SAGA

2009-09-08T01:30:00.008-05:00

Alternate title: "Boobs: TEH COMPLETE SAGA."

( Everyone dies! )

A day without cats? Spend it HERE!

2009-09-05T23:48:00.003-05:00

Some blogger dude decided that 9/9/09 should be recognized this year as A Day Without Cats on the internet.

This means no LOLCats, no cute YouTube kittens, no T. S. Eliot, nothing.

I humbly suggest you satisfy your unnatural lust for badly captioned images by browsing LOLXena on September 9! Remember, we only featured cats on this site ONCE, and they were both dead at the time.

Getting the kinks out

2009-08-30T17:30:00.004-05:00

Anarkist is pretty ballsy to criticize Xena's S&M safety practices.

Anarky!

2009-08-29T23:13:00.003-05:00

Have no fear, dear readers. Anarkist has returned with a full plate of good ol'-fashioned LOLXenas.

Seven Deadly LOLs

2009-08-29T16:49:00.012-05:00

Here we go, team - the Seven Deadly Sins, LOLXena style! Hooray! Crack open the fatted calf! (...And so on and so forth...)

I got ANOTHER present!

2009-08-28T20:46:00.005-05:00

Yet another LOLXena reader proves she is a better person than you are by contributing to this site. In her own special way!

Please welcome back Xedra as she gives us the sequel to her LOLXena video!

Eye'm right here

2009-08-28T17:23:00.003-05:00

In honor of new guest-blogger Anarkist, I think you should skip my next sentence and go straight to the LOLCallisto.

(Ha ha, made you look!)

mah undawears

2009-08-28T17:06:00.003-05:00

More underwear jokes than you could Everhope for.

Halftime

2009-08-25T07:34:00.002-05:00

Spencer is taking a short break from her Xena Yearbook series to dabble in individual LOLity.

HOW many images??

2009-08-24T08:22:00.003-05:00

Here we go, little ones. I have dabbled in the crazy world of gifs! These are for the 'Golden Chakram' awards over at XOC, so get over there now - you know who to vote for!!

For the 'Hate' category:

And for the 'Episode Based' Category:

I am also in the 'Informal Love' category, although not with a traditional lol, so yeah, knock yourselves out!

/shameless plug

'scuse me

2009-08-23T17:55:00.002-05:00

Gabrielle needs rescuing almost as often as Mindy makes new LOLs.

( Some things never change )

Wig-Alien Invasion

2009-08-23T16:32:00.006-05:00

Heather was abducted by aliens. They probed her in pursuit of these LOLs, but she miraculously escaped and gave them to us:

Because Xena fans are scary

2009-08-22T22:40:00.003-05:00

Original flavor:

Extra crispy:

( Iolaus seems to agree )

I got a present!

2009-08-22T20:31:00.006-05:00

Mindy, in her recent spate of creativity, endeavored to produce this lovely LOLXena logo!

Now the real question is, why didn't YOU make me anything? >:| Get on that, ASAP!

P.S. Don't try to steal it for your own site. I think people will figure out where you got it.

---

EDIT: Non sequitor!

Here are the past 100 site visitors. I wished for every continent, and I collected the entire** set! Thanks, everybody.

** Antarctica out of stock.

Ancient Greek Sign Language

2009-08-22T20:21:00.009-05:00

Mindy has been very busy documenting this fascinating phenomenon.

( I guess she found mah bukkit? )

Oh Mindy

2009-08-22T20:15:00.005-05:00

Oh Mindy
You caaaame and you gaaaave without taaaaaking
but you know what, I didn't send you away like that Barry Manilow @$$hole. See, look!

Xena Cinema Classics VI

2009-08-16T19:20:00.030-05:00

Xena Season 3 Yearbook: 1983

2009-08-15T22:48:00.007-05:00

Undeterred by movie parodies, the intrepid Spencer scours the third season of Xena to bring us the third installment of her yearbook series!

NEW POLL

2009-08-14T22:24:00.007-05:00

~~Between~~ Among the four of us, Ripples, Heather, Spencer, and I have posted around 175 LOLXenas in the past three days. After you read 'em (and link 'em for all your internet friends!), you can pay us back by humoring me in the poll at the bottom of the main page.

Sorry if these pages take forever to load (due to sheer volume of LOLs). I haven't heard any complaints yet, so I'm going to leave them this way for now.

As always, feel free to send in your own LOLs by emailing them to spastic (dot) reindeer (at) comcast (dot) net!

Xena Cinema Classics V

2009-08-14T21:37:00.008-05:00

( Oh please. Like you haven't seen this movie. )

Xena Cinema Classics IV

2009-08-14T17:52:00.009-05:00

( Just for fun: The 'Disney (is evil)' tag )

Xena Cinema Classics III

2009-08-13T18:36:00.072-05:00

Xena Cinema Classics II

2009-08-13T17:04:00.012-05:00

( Just for fun: The 'Wizard of Oz' tag )

Xena Cinema Classics

2009-08-13T12:29:00.011-05:00

( Just for fun: The 'Lord of the Rings' tag )

Horsee!

2009-08-13T12:13:00.002-05:00

( A small tribute to Rifftrax: Harry Potter )

Xena cops another feel

2009-08-13T11:37:00.003-05:00

We are now in our third year of LOLXena, and until now, we have never managed to make a Jeff Goldblum joke.

Heather shows us how it's done!

Xena Season 2 Yearbook: 1982

2009-08-12T11:26:00.005-05:00

Spencer brings us the second installment of the Xena Yearbook!

Xena Season 1 Yearbook: 1981

2009-08-06T19:39:00.007-05:00

HOLY CRAP you guys!

After Spencer sent in her Amazon Class of '86 LOLs, I was all like "you should do more of these!" And then she was all like, "Check this out, yo." And then I was all = O because, I mean, come on!

So now Spencer has promised to make yearbooks for 1982-1986 (seasons 2-6) as well. And THAT, ladies and the occasional gentleman, is how you earn your own LOLXena theme tag!

COOKIES!!! OM NOM NOM NOM

2009-08-06T19:26:00.004-05:00

Please welcome new LOLXena-er Heather!

Heather's nerdy email signature is Úilye man reana nar vanwa.*** We can infer from this that she was absolutely NOT lost when she first stumbled upon our humble LOLsite!

***LotR-speak for "Not all those who wander are lost."

I AM IN UR BASE BLOCKIN UR SPOTLITEZ

2009-08-02T21:38:00.006-05:00

Spencer gives us a glimpse of the Amazon's 1986 yearbook... which contains much lulz.

Shwing Shwong Jokes FTW

2009-07-29T13:21:00.021-05:00

My first venture into LOLHercs proves to be less scarring than first thought. The Xena trilogy helped me adjust to the changing process. Maybe not for you, but ho-hum...

The return of Xena vs. Internet!

2009-07-28T15:45:00.009-05:00

I happen to love these comics based on nothing but reaction shots. So all complaints should be redirected to Monica, who seems to agree!

That was fast!

2009-07-28T15:39:00.004-05:00

Monica proves she has no life outside of making LOLXenas by quickly responding with six more LOLs!

Recession, my @$$.

Recession Monica could only afford to send 5 LOLs

2009-07-28T15:30:00.006-05:00

. . . But she promised to send more!

Behold, the power of ~~cheese~~ Monica!

ROAD TRIP: Teh Complete Saga

2009-07-27T15:35:00.012-05:00

The Ridikyoolus Hedgeer Kompitishun

2009-07-27T09:56:00.016-05:00

Ok people, this is it. The one we've all been waiting for. There were many nominees, many potential winners, but who will be decalred champion?

Plus, everyone loves a strategically placed '#2'.

*drumroll*

Monica lives

2009-07-23T10:49:00.010-05:00

~~Zombie~~ Xombie Monica W crawled out of her grave to say this: "Yeah, I'm still alive." Then she sent me this proof!

Told you, naysayers :P

( Remember the '90s? Of course you do. )

( Let's call this one homage to our LOLmaster Maclay! )

Spencer is back!

2009-07-23T10:41:00.004-05:00

We did our best to scare Spencer away from this horrible place, but she is a glutton for punishment! And so is Gabby, apparently...

2 years!

2009-07-21T00:21:00.004-05:00

It's been over two years now since I first googled the word "lolxena" and only came up with one result, a picture which was neither funny, nor captioned. Ergo, I can reliably say that it has been two years since I invented LOLXenas!

...Of course, I was merely piggybacking off the success of other LOLsites like LOLBuffy, etc., which in turn were parodies of icanhascheezburger, a site which basically commercialized, neutered, and ruined the legendary Caturday meme on 4chan. But you guys seem to enjoy it, so hey! Welcome to year 3.

Caturday is a story for another time, kids. Isn't it past your bedtime?

New stuff soon. I promise.

--

FUN FACT: The first LOLXena was, 4 srs, a LOLHerc.

Elfy I: PANTS.

2009-07-13T21:27:00.003-05:00

Elfrieda has returned at last from the XOC to ponder the meaning of leather pants, as well as purple and non-purple body parts.

What does this really mean?

IT'S TIME FOR SOME NEW LOLHERCS!!!11one

Elfy II: Drugs and other deviancy!

2009-07-13T21:20:00.002-05:00

Elfrieda knows a LOT about crystal meth, funky browies, henbane-laced nutbread, and psychotic behavior, for some reason.

Elfy III: Gurrrrrrl, puh-LEEZE!

2009-07-13T21:14:00.003-05:00

Elfrieda shares the non-hetero love. Why should Xena subbers have all the fun?

Elfy IV: Merchandising Wrongs

2009-07-13T21:09:00.002-05:00

Elfrieda strikes again! I never get sick of those crossover episodes.

Elfy V: The Grab Bag

2009-07-13T21:03:00.004-05:00

Elfrieda recommends you read at least 5 LOLAres per day to maintain healthy teeth and nose hairs.

Elfy VI: LOLHercs with plot references!

2009-07-13T20:57:00.004-05:00

Elfrieda made some LOLHercs that actually make more sense if you've watched the series. At last, you are rewarded for your efforts with some internet immaturity!

The 43-year-old virgin

2009-07-12T22:27:00.003-05:00

( For the record: Not an anti-gay joke, just a funny movie. )

GLEDAI MA GLEDAI

2009-07-12T15:47:00.002-05:00

So after yesterday's LOLXena Karaoke Thunderdome, loyal (and possibly only) reader Maxine kicked my non-Bulgarian ass when she discovered that Cyrene was singing the wrong lyrics!